Many people attending training courses over the years are healers. They use different modalities, but a common one is Reiki. In case you haven’t heard of it, Reiki is an energy healing modality. It requires that practitioners hold intention and openness and allow healing energy to flow through them to the client. For the scientifically minded amongst you anything related to ‘energy’ or non-allopathic medicine will likely come across as pseudoscience. That would have been my reaction 20 years ago. But having learned more about energy, had people on trainings who make a living using it, and having had experiences where I have felt energy, I am now more open to the idea. Though still only in terms of modalities like Reiki being complementary to allopathic medicine, not an alternative. Recently a friend of mine has applied for a NHS job at a hospice, being Reiki trained is a requirement.
As it happens, any ‘healer’ does not actually heal the client. What they do is offer the client the vibration (New Age term) of the healed state. It’s then the client’s choice whether or not to match that state. This idea got me thinking about the vibration, the qualities of the healed mental state. I have been training and coaching people for over 20 years, and in that time, and before, I have read a lot of content about the human condition, psychology, religion, and personal development. Working with people I am acutely aware that I cannot change them, they have to come to the healed mental state themselves, all I can do is present that to them.
What I have included below are my ideas about what the healed mental state is like. I am sure you will have your own ideas too. So, as you look through this list, consider in your own mind what the structure of the healed mental state is.
- Love and accept yourself as you are: There is only one person who is a constant feature in your life, and that’s you. If there are things you do not like about yourself, then change them. If you can’t change them or if you don’t want to change them, then live with them because that is who you are. In life all we can ever be is ourselves, you cannot ever be anyone else.
- Take responsibility: Like the idea above, you are the only person who is going to make things happen in your life. For sure other people will help you, but at the end of the day you are the one who is living your life, so you are the one who is responsible for it. The good news about that, is it means you are the one who can do something to change it.
- Develop emotional intelligence (EQ): Having a high IQ will get you hired, but you need good EQ to get promoted. EQ includes things like self-awareness, awareness of others, managing yourself (diary, to do list, being proactive not reactive), and leadership and management of others.
- Reduce negative emotional triggers: Feeling emotions in life, even negative ones is par for the course. But what we should aim to do is reduce the frequency of experiencing them and minimise the triggers that cause them. There are many ways to do this, Time Line Therapy™ being one.
- Hold positive beliefs about yourself: What you believe has a significant impact on how much of your innate potential you tap into, the effort you make and, as a consequence, the results you get.
- Create positive habits: This could be anything which you do habitually that enhances your life. Like exercise, staying in touch with friends or family, reading, spending time in nature, or meditating, or any manner of other things.
- Have goals in your life: Few things are as well supported in psychology as having goals. Goals that you feel invested in enhance your results by 20-25%, and even more if you write them down.
- Able to face challenges: Life always seems to bring some challenges along for the ride. Rather than being downhearted about this, do you have the emotional and mental bandwidth to deal with them. Can you face life’s challenges and use them to help yourself grow.
- Able to focus your attention in the now: Life only happens in the now. If you spend too much time in the past you are more likely to feel negative emotions. If you spend too much attention in the future you are more likely to feel anxious. Live in the now, as much as you can. It is a bit corny, but I’ll say it anyway – this is why it’s called the present, it is a gift.
What else do you think makes up the structure of the healed mental state? As much as I can, I adopt these in my life, and I aim to bring coaching clients and training delegates to this place too.
“Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Abraham Lincoln
