Entrepreneur, author, and mother of four, Bianca Best recently gave me a copy of her latest book, Big Impact Without Burnout: 8 Energizing Strategies to Stop Struggling and Start Soaring. Through her book she wants to help woman to achieve their full potential without compromising themselves in the process. Though aimed at women there are lessons for all of us in her book.
I believe we are on this planet for a reason. The specific reasons may be different, some may seem big, some may seem small, that doesn’t matter. What does matter, what does make a difference, is to fully be you, the best version of you that you can be. In fact, you could say that the reason we are here on this planet is to simply be ourselves. In essence that is what Bianca’s book is about. It lets you know that that is all you need to do, and then it empowers you to do it. In many ways this reminds me of the universal coaching formula proffered by coaching expert Sir John Whitmore –
Performance = potential – interference (P=p-i)
Performance is simply your behaviour and the results that they create in your life. It could be at work, in your family, in your relationships, with your health, or in any other aspect of your life. Potential is about tapping into the fullness of your abilities, interests, and imagination. It’s about fully stepping into who you truly are. The things which prevent us from doing that are what Whitmore labels as interference. These can be external or internal. External things are the multiplicity of demands on our time and attention. Bosses, children, partners, parents, friends, and life admin, such as shopping, house or car maintenance, cooking, cleaning, and ironing. Add to this the distractions of social media and TV and it is a wonder we get anything done. Now of course all of these can be things we are passionate about and all of them have a positive place in our lives, but we are the ones that need to prioritise and balance them. Internal interference is our negative thinking and self-talk, our limiting beliefs, negative emotions, internal conflicts, and an inability to focus. The first step to working with these is to bring them into awareness. Sometimes that is enough to resolve the issue and sometimes working with someone who can help you to apply specific change techniques and processes for letting them go is helpful.
If you are working by yourself, you can use books like Big Impact Without Burnout, to help guide you through the process of letting go of internal interference, managing external interference, and stepping fully into the maximum potential of your true you. This approach isn’t about becoming uber efficient, or ‘faking it till you make it’, it is finding ways to say ‘no’ to the things which drain the life force from you, and ‘yes’ to the things that make you buzz with energy and excitement.
We all have gifts to share with other people, be they acts of service, skills and abilities, or simply the gift of our presence. If we are not actually being our true selves then we are depriving people of the gifts they need so that they can, in turn, be their true selves. Holding yourself back is holding others back too, but empowering yourself to fully express yourself is the surest way to maximise your impact.
“There does not need to be strife in a life of impact.” Bianca Best