Fighting Fire with Fire

"‘Fighting fire with fire’ is a commonly used idiom, meaning to use like force against like force. It most likely comes from the practice of creating a fire break to manage a wildfire, by burning fuel in its path, thereby depriving the wildfire of energy. Creating a fire break can be an effective method of […]"

‘Fighting fire with fire’ is a commonly used idiom, meaning to use like force against like force. It most likely comes from the practice of creating a fire break to manage a wildfire, by burning fuel in its path, thereby depriving the wildfire of energy. Creating a fire break can be an effective method of fire control. The Great Fire of London in 1666 was eventually tackled by creating fire breaks using gunpowder, and because the wind eventually changed direction pushing the fire back onto already burnt areas. Indeed, it is believed that if firebreaks had been employed much sooner, the fire could have been contained on the first day instead of running out of control for three more days. So evidently you can fight fire with fire, hence the term. But most of the time we actually fight fire with water. Wet stuff doesn’t burn so easily, and large amounts of water can suffocate fire. If you really want to understand what stops fire, then it is having nothing to burn, because it’s wet or already burnt, or there is no oxygen to feed the fire. In other words, you starve it. So let us put this fallacy to bed once and for all. You do not fight fire with fire, you starve fire of the fuel and or the oxygen.

It is quite a common and well understood concept in therapy to break the cycle of mental, emotional, and or physical abuse. By doing so it isn’t passed onto future generations. People frame it in their minds as – “I know how I have suffered and because I care about others, I don’t want them to suffer either. Therefore, this stops with me, I will find new, and different ways to behave.”

Can we start to do this in international relations now too? A fine concept you may think, but how do we do it? First of all what stops us from doing this now? I think these things contribute to the perpetuation of violent cycles –

  • Seeing people as others. All of us from the politicians down separate people into ethnic, racial, and religious groups of them and us, at home and abroad.
  • The government and the governed seeing the government as the protector of the ‘people’, and having to project strength. Taking a blow without retaliation is seen as weakness.
  • Failing to let go of the past, failing to learn from it and then to let it go.
  • Failing to have the courage to forgive. This involves placing yourself in the shoes of someone else. Forgiveness doesn’t mean allowing negative behaviour to continue. If your partner was unfaithful you could forgive them, but whether you choose to stay in a relationship with them is a separate matter.
  • To quote Carl von Clausewitz – “War is diplomacy by other means”. If we removed war as an option, then we would have to find other means of resolving our conflicts.
  • Letting egos get in the way of negotiated solutions. This includes the ideas of blame and right and wrong.
  • Feeding conflict by selling weapons to the protagonists.
  • Seeing life on earth as a material undertaking only.

I am not a politician, a military man, or a diplomat, but if we do not deal with these issues, then increasingly violent cycles is all we will ever experience, until we have destroyed the planet. At some point, someone, somewhere has to have the courage to say, “STOP, enough is enough.” You don’t fight fire with fire, you fight it by starving it of fuel and oxygen.

You might well of course think that’s all ‘pie in the sky’. Who would be stupid enough to do this first, you might think. Well Switzerland and Ireland seem to be doing a pretty good job of staying out of international conflicts. Yet Switzerland still has an army, in fact most Swiss men still have to undergo a form of national service. And at the same time Switzerland contributes to UN Peacekeeping operations. They have a neutrality mind-set, and they achieve peace through strength without exporting violence. Let’s at least start by recognising that we have a problem with violence, and commit ourselves to working on it. Until we get everyone on the planet to express peace in their behaviour, we will still have to defend ourselves. But surely, we can do so in a more measured way than we have been doing, so that the terror of our ‘defence’ doesn’t echo through eternity.

“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.” Albert Einstein

Ewan Mochrie

Ewan Mochrie

Master Trainer of NLP

Ewan Mochrie is the founder and Managing Director of Inspire 360.  Since 2006 Ewan has had the pleasure of certifying many NLP Practitioners & NLP Master Practitioners across the UK and around the world. He also supports many multi-national organisations and small business owners by delivering NLP bespoke training programmes and Executive Coaching sessions to enhance business performance and improve communication skills.

Ewan is fast becoming a household name, because of his fantastic knowledge and delivery of NLP training.  He makes the training fun, interactive and thought provoking, whilst demonstrating a clear passion for the specialist subjects he teaches.

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