The most valuable asset that you possess is your self-worth. It’s expansive, dynamic and limitless. Self-worth is the fuel for the engine that drives you forward, enabling you to share your gifts with others. Though fundamentally it is, as the name suggests, something you build from within, you can teach others how to cultivate and grow their own. People who are experiencing a lack of self-worth is one of the most common things that I see on NLP Practitioner trainings, and with personal clients. A potential negative consequence of having low self-worth is that one can become needy, seeking from others what seems to be missing inside. When people don’t get an affirmation of self-worth from others, then they can engage in emotional or manipulative behaviours in a further attempt to get it. Even people who appear to be egotistical, usually also have low self-esteem. They are inflating a false sense of self in an attempt to cover this up. Though they might not admit this of course. Other ways in which low self-worth can manifest, is finding that other people are taking you for granted, or overstepping your boundaries; not achieving what you want to achieve in life; or a natural inward search for answers has become instead a negative cycle of depression.
Self-worth is simply a centred acceptance of self, as the self is. When you look in the mirror, physically and psychologically do you like and appreciate what you see. If not, can you change it? And there is more that you can change than you might imagine. If you really honestly cannot change what you see in the mirror, then you need to find the courage to love yourself as you are. How can we expect others to love us if we do not first of all love ourselves. The path to change is simple enough;
- Decide that you need to make changes,
- Accept that you are ultimately responsible for making any change,
- Forgive yourself for past mistakes,
- Accept and appreciate yourself as you are,
- Set an objective for change, and
- Take action.
Physically there are changes that we can make to our appearance relatively easily, we can also address nutrition and exercise. All these take is a little focus and dedication. If you don’t know how to change your appearance, or don’t know how to address nutrition or exercise, then find someone who does. Psychologically with NLP, Time Line Therapy™, Hypnosis and Coaching, it is possible to let go of negative emotions from the past; integrate any sense of conflict that you might have; let go of limiting beliefs about yourself; find motivation; change habits, and develop a more positive outlook. I see people doing these things every week. Judge your progress over the long term. Do not compare yourself negatively to others, only compare yourself with how you were before.
Let me give you a little bit of metaphysical assistance on the path to boosting your self-esteem too. We live in a world of time and space, there was a yesterday and there will be a tomorrow, but right now it is now. In fact when you just stop and think about it, it is always now, all of your life experience happens now, always. Time is a nice illusion that we have created, so that we can experience life step by step. When you go to the cinema you watch the film frame by frame in sequence. But all of the film existed already before you went into the cinema to see it. If now is all that you can experience, and if you exist now, then you too are part of the whole enormous tapestry that is called Now. And you must exist for a reason, because without you the tapestry would not be complete. Also appreciate that if you exist now, and if now is all there is, then you will never not exist, period. Sure your consciousness and your experience might transform, but you are here to stay.
“Jump, and you will find out how to unfold your wings as you fall.” Ray Bradbury